The Nightmare Before Easter

Eggs make me sick

One of the scariest days of the year is almost upon us, the day we prepare for by boiling chicken fetuses alive and decorate their corpses’ shells as though they were mere decorations for our amusement, before hiding them from our children and watching them search in absolute futility. The one responsible for this trespassing crime is supposedly a giant, walking, talking rabbit who comes into your house and steals back the eggs while you’re sleeping, scatters them around the house and yard for its own sick pleasure as it watches from behind the bushes while the kids struggle to find them. What a sociopath.

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Boba Tea with…Cheese? Try it!

Drink at a 45 degree angle
Sounds Cheesy

Taiwan has a new trend that the west coast is embracing, and brace yourself: it’s going to sound super weird. But try it, I implore you foodie nerds. It’s breathtaking and has all the makings of a masterpiece.

If you’ve tried boba or bubble tea, you’re familiar with the sweet tea base that is made “bubbly” with tapioca pearls at the bottom of the cup, the top sealed shut with plastic and an oversized straw with a point as the spear to access the delicious combination. Continue reading “Boba Tea with…Cheese? Try it!”

How to swap snow for sand this winter

Some people might think snow is a gorgeous blanket of peace and calm as it’s falling. The tiny speckled frost kisses gracefully adorn the streets, the grasses are mysteriously hidden, the doggies become frantic with glee as they kick up the snow with their snow paws. What a peaceful wonderland, you say smiling with your hot chocolate in one hand and sweater tightly across your shoulders.

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The Newdie Foodie

Talents are varied and some people might be able to play the banjo with their toes, be the next promising candidate for Ryan Gosling’s muse, or maybe have
feet naturally shaped in a point so that ballet dancing is a default method of transportation.

I however, have one skill above them all; Eating With Enthusiasm. It’s a recognized sport between myself and my travel companion to Asia, featured below eating a sought-after pineapple bun. Leah and I teamed up together to become the best Enthusiastic Eaters, refining our taste bud muscles to supplement our previous training when we lived in Seoul as professional Korean BBQ Pursuers. Continue reading “The Newdie Foodie”

Seoul Food | Korean BBQ is better in Korea – Duh!

Now that is Seoul food

My dear friend Joshua recently and foolishly suggested that his Korean food choice in Queens would be “just as good” as the food I’d be eating in Seoul, the land of morning calm city I was currently vacationing. As a former resident of Seoul back in 2011 and an enthusiastic advocate of all things Korean culture, I considered myself a perfect opponent for this foodie challenge. To prepare, I brushed my teeth in gochujang, the defining sauce in Korean cuisine, and I gargled with the juices leftover from the kimchi jar. This was going to get fierce. Continue reading “Seoul Food | Korean BBQ is better in Korea – Duh!”

Gore-met | A tour of some of the worlds creepiest foods

It's toesen
I propose a toe-st!

Halloween is inarguably the best holiday of the year, so I won’t waste time discussing the greatness that is gathering with friends and dressing as your inner slutty vegetable or dinosaur while drinking fruit punch out of a bowl shaped like a zombie head, snacking on gummy worms crawling through Oreo cookie mud, and walking into a haunted house where clowns wield chainsaws.

What I love about the magical spookiness of Halloween is the ability to escape the mundane world of suits, ties, and human day-to-day things in favor of a mystery; the chance to break free of obligations and become whatever you want to be without consequence. It’s also an excuse to spread glitter all over your date or your new lover. You can wake up next to Batman, or if you’re even luckier, a Spartan soldier. Continue reading “Gore-met | A tour of some of the worlds creepiest foods”

Tomatina Tommy

This looks very clean
The giant creatures were ruthless
His name was Tommy, and he was ready to fulfill his duty as an officer of a the Red Pulp Army. He was ripe for the good fight, he was eager to prove his worth to his people, and he had just cut his stem into a trendy fringe. 
Tommy glanced at the mirror one last time, his innocence lingering as though it were the only thing keeping him from stepping forth into his destiny. 

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First Date Food Follies

She's a catch
It finally happened. On a rainy summer morning, as I rummaged through my purse looking for a headband to tame my locks made curly by the outside curse of humidity, my coffee barista object of primal infatuation locked eyes with me for more than the casual two seconds allotted to strangers who seem mildly attractive. Two became three, then five, and his eyes stayed lingering on my own for more than six seconds of crush eternity. 

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